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PUBLIC FOOLISHNESS ARCHIVE
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I used to run with the Conformity Society, a bunch of nondescript hipsters here in Vapid City who banded together under the pretense that their street pranks and boring costumed events were unique from the rest of Vapid City's nondescript hipsters' street pranks and boring costumed events. Likewise, the rest of VC's hipsters refused to join the Conformity Society, for the exact same reasons.

In a way, the Conformos actually were unique, though, in that they never claimed it was art. Good for them.

Here's an archive of some of the more successful goofs we pulled in my short time with them.

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PIGEON ROAST
in Union Square
(with the Bay Area Rotisserie Friends)

A pleasant summer afternoon's diversion

  • A story in the Guardian about the event
  • A downloadable PDF of the informational brochure we handed out at the event. Educational!
  • Some photos

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Shaking things up with my activist group,
ARTISTS FOR EARTHQUAKES

Back in dotcom days, the influx of bland midwestern fortune-seekers into VC resulted in skyrocketing rents and eviction rates for long-time residents. "What we really need," I thought, "is an earthquake." Meanwhile, artists were leaving the city in droves as the overpaid yuppies, rewarded for their poor business instincts with piles of speculator-provided cash, bought up the available art spaces at a horrifying clip. Suddenly I realized I had the solution to both problems.

  • A brief story in VC weekly's "Dogbitten" column about our first demonstration. Another 5 seconds off my 15 minutes of fame!
  • original web page

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PILGRIMAGE TO THE MICROSOFT STORE

Here's where a bunch of us donned monastic robes and made a pilgrimage to the Microsoft Store at the Astreon shopping mall - there to offer thanks, recite a liturgy, genuflect in the direction of Redmond, and find out Where Bill Wants Us To Go Today.

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OUR SUNDAY PICNIC

So, this friend of mine, he works across the street from a 24 Hour Fitness gym. One day, he's walking down the street eating his lunch, and he stops to think about something... and suddenly notices he's got a row of people on treadmills staring out the gym's huge window at him, watching him eat. Thus, a great idea was born. We got a bucket of fried chicken, a dozen donuts, and a couple of lawn chairs...

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THE CONVERGENCE OF THE CONSUMER HERD

We went shopping on the day after Thanksgiving. The TV said we had to. The sheep masks were our own idea. Baaaah! Buu-u-u-uy! Buu-u-u-uy! Baaaah!

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ANTI-PLAGUE SNAKE OIL FLYER

I used to put this up around town. Like most of my best jokes, this was timely, and poked fun once again at the problems caused by the influx of dot-commers. It was done in the style of an old snake-oil remedy flyer, claiming to advertise a tonic that would solve your various econnomic and housing difficulties.
  • On-screen GIF version
  • Downloadable PDF

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SANTARCHY IN THE USA

Huge crowds of people dressing up as Santa Claus and causing chaos is a favorite Vapid City pastime. (See VC Lexicon: Costume, Counterconformist and Trivial Arts entries.)

MAD SANTA PUB CRAWL (2000): Exactly what it sounds like. What started as a clever prank in which a bunch of people pretended to be a class of drunks celebrating graduation from Santa School, degenerated into an annual event in which 75 people dressed as Santa Claus, armed with bullhorns and Pine-Sol bottles full of beer, descend randomly upon a bunch of bars and strip joints. I dressed up as the SantaBomber, with hooded sweatshirt, sunglasses, Santa hat, and a plain-brown-paper-wrapped package addressed to the Easter Bunny.

SANTA SHOOTOUT: Santas with guns. If you're familiar at all with the denizens of the Trivial Arts Scene here in VC, this one is a natural. So counterconformist as to be written about adoringly in not one but both of VC's weekly papers.

Fun, fun, fun!

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